On relationships

Some time ago, a friend asked me some questions on love and relationships that got me to thinking about the key to lasting relationships. How does one know that one has already found The One or that no one better will come along? Or is there even The One to begin with?

I used to want to believe in this idea of a perfect soulmate, but over the years I have become more ambivalent. We all hope to find someone with whom we can click or connect with instantly, whom we feel can look into the depths of our soul. But the reality may be that even if we do manage to find this special person, we may not end up together.

Whether or not two people who are attracted to each other eventually end up together, I think, is dependent upon a confluence of factors such as whether both parties are able to communicate with each other, commit to each other, and can see themselves with each other.

Once the special someone is found, I think one needs to make a conscious decision to commit to that person. I used to believe when I was younger that love conquers all, that true love should be able to withstand all tests. But I have since come to realise that man is by nature imperfect, and even what is considered the truest love can be and must be vulnerable. Thus it is folly, I feel, to court temptation or attempt to put a relationship one truly values to the test. One should instead seek to avoid situations where either party may be tempted to stray, to the best of one's ability.

Finding love isn't easy. Keeping it, arduous.