Harry Potter (controlled) mania

The world has been gripped by Harry Potter fever over the last week as the final instalment in the series was released.

I've never considered myself a die-hard fan, but I dutifully placed my order for the Deathly Hallows just days before its release. On the day the book hit the shelves, I didn't rush down to Borders first thing in the morning even though I had to work later in the day. But what I did do was to make a special trip down to the store during dinner time to collect my order - something that didn't pass without comment from C, who wondered why I couldn't wait another day to pick up the book.

In the days that followed, I didn't cut myself off from civilisation or sacrifice my sleep time (or at least, not much of it), but I did make it a point not to schedule any appointments, and used whatever time I could find to read the book, even bringing it to the office so that I could sneak in one or two chapters after my work was done for the day, until I finally completed the 600-plus pages on the 5th day after my purchase.

For non-fans like C, I probably count as some sort of obsessed fan, but I'm positive that in the eyes of the hardcore fans, what I did was hardly worth mentioning. They would in all likelihood have shut themselves up somewhere and devoured the book in a day or less.

So where does that leave me? I guess I would consider my symptoms some form of controlled mania. I wouldn't call it the full-blown kind for two reasons. First, of course, I didn't go with the flow entirely. Second, I was fully conscious of the decision I made to allow myself to take up the Harry Potter "project".

It's been a long time since I last got caught up in any activity or project. Those days when I obsessed over NKOTB, or built my thesis from scratch are over. But I do miss the rush that comes from actively pursuing some project, getting caught up in the heat of things, especially if it comes without the self-conscious reflexivity that can be such a dampener.

I can't help noticing the farcicality of it all, but the least I can do is to attempt to deceive myself into pretending that it matters and taking it seriously - hence the controlled nature of my Harry Potter mania.

And just for the record - I enjoyed myself.